THE IMPORTANCE OF SETTING BOUNDARIES IN ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS: Don’t Do What Doesn’t Feel Right
No matter how harsh it may sound at first, it is very important and necessary to set boundaries in every relationship. Romantic relationships are no exception, so it’s crucial to clearly define boundaries with your partner that will protect you from unwanted interference in things you don’t feel comfortable with.
Digital boundaries include those related to your computer, social networks, mobile phone, and online profiles.
Sharing information about your bank account, talking about how you spend money, or giving access to your credit cards is not necessary.
Feel free to “open up” when you become comfortable enough to share more sensitive parts of yourself with your partner.
They will help you decide what level of vulnerability you feel comfortable sharing with your loved one. They allow you to choose how you want to be treated while also respecting your partner’s boundaries so you can offer support. But what exactly are personal boundaries, and do you know how to set them in relationships?
In romantic relationships, personal boundaries are limits we set around our bodies, space, emotions, financial information, and digital presence. We decide what we want to share with our partner, and they also choose what they want to share with us. Once you set these boundaries, mutual trust and respect will be very important for maintaining them, and it’s entirely up to you to decide what suits you best. If your partner “pressures” you to redefine your boundaries, know that this is not okay on their part, and at any moment you have the choice to decide and do what feels right to you.
Experts from the American association of social workers and psychologists called “Love is Respect” conducted a survey and asked respondents: “Which boundaries are most important to set?” The most common answer was: “All of them!” Therefore, the members of this institution decided to explain a few types of boundaries we can establish.
Digital
These include boundaries related to your computer, social networks, mobile phone, and online profiles. This group also includes digital communication such as sexting (sending messages with sexual content, which may include photos), regular text messages, and posting on social media. Reflect on how you feel about all these and decide what would suit you best before talking to your boyfriend or girlfriend. It would be good to think about questions like: “Do I feel comfortable with my photo being posted on my partner’s social media?” or: “Do I want the status of our relationship to be publicly shown?” Defining your answers can help you clearly state your boundaries to your loved one and help them understand how to respect them.
It’s also important to set boundaries regarding access to your various online accounts. Even if you fully trust your partner, you don’t have to share your passwords if you choose not to, and this should not affect the quality of your relationship and mutual trust.
Physical
These are “set” around your body, home, and places you frequently visit. Such boundaries help you determine your comfort level regarding physical touch and intimacy, showing affection in public, and when physical contact feels harmful to you in any way. Understand what feels best for you and communicate that to your partner.
It’s well known that in a relationship, both partners can experience strong emotions, and sometimes you may get very angry about a situation with your loved one. But when you learn to manage your feelings, it becomes easier to clear your mind and rationally discuss problems with your partner. Disagreements are natural and inevitably happen in every healthy relationship. However, any physical harm that occurs during an argument or at any other moment in the relationship is never okay or acceptable.
Financial
These are boundaries regarding your income, bank account, credit cards, and other money-related matters. If you feel comfortable talking to your partner about how much you earn or sharing your bank account information, feel free to do so. However, sharing details about your bank account, discussing how you spend money, or giving access to your credit cards is not necessary, especially if you don’t feel comfortable discussing such details. If you live with your partner, it’s essential to have an honest conversation about your monthly expenses and what you believe you can afford. But that doesn’t mean you have to share every aspect of your financial situation. Money is a sensitive topic, and it’s completely acceptable not to share all your financial details with your partner.
Emotional
These boundaries “surround” your feelings, vulnerability, and trust. They help you decide how much you want to “open your heart” to your partner. Over time, as your relationship deepens, decide what emotional support means to you. Talk about how both of you perceive consistency and try to demonstrate it to each other. Building trust, which in turn brings greater vulnerability and openness to your loved one, takes time and entirely depends on you. Don’t rush this process; follow your own pace. Feel free to “open up” when you become comfortable enough to share more sensitive parts of yourself with your partner.
Although it’s beautiful to be in love and spend time with your partner, it’s equally important and healthy for the relationship to have emotional independence. This means it’s completely okay for you or your partner to spend time apart, socializing with friends or family, or to pursue different interests separately. This gives you both the necessary amount of time to maintain personal relationships that exist outside of your romantic relationship.
Although boundaries may sometimes seem like they “hinder” a relationship, these personal parameters actually help create the foundation for a healthy partnership full of love and respect. Digital, physical, financial, and emotional boundaries are essential for a balanced and successful romantic relationship. Deciding what feels right in these areas of life and in romantic relationships can help your partner learn how to better support you and build trust to deepen your connection. Boundaries are a two-way street and should be respected by both sides involved. The good thing is they’re never set in stone. You always have the choice to change your mind as your relationship develops and adjust your boundaries based on your comfort level.
Overcoming Challenges
When boundaries are unclear or your loved one ignores them, it can lead to significant challenges.
Some examples include: Saying “yes” when you mean “no” to avoid conflict or please your partner; Saying “no” as a form of punishment or withdrawal; Expecting your partner to read your mind instead of communicating clearly; Trying to control your partner’s behavior through manipulation. Addressing these patterns requires honest conversations, a willingness to take responsibility, and dedication to creating a healthier relationship. If you care about the relationship, we are sure you are ready for this – write Novosti.
